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'Cunt' Tim Ramsdale has arms just like the rest of us, he just doesn't like using them for passing, preferring instead to run up blind alleys on his own. His dummies rarely work on the training ground, but they occasionally come off against extremely naive opposition. Tim is a total dead weight on any night out, thus he was last season's "anti-social secretary". His hobbies include going back to Hawii because he thinks he can shag someone there, and offending people he's just met. Tim trains Dolphins by trade. Dolphins are intelligent creatures, but even a small rodent could tell that Tim's social ineptitude beggars belief. This photo was taken after the Bath Spa game, in which Tim threw an outrageous - and unusually successful - dummy, and roared as he realised his own genius - this was the start of a popular Hands tradition. |
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Jack Whibley: Despite stiff competition in the Hands back row, Jack has burst into the Hands at blind-side flank this season, filling the boots of his former housemate Douglas Pickles. Another rowing convert, Jack's fitness has yet to be drowned in beer like the rest of us, and so far, his athleticism and strong running have been a real boon to the Hands. This man won the Turner prize while in Scotland, and was the first to wear the coveted jacket - see the photo gallery to see just how stupid he looked. Girls seem to really like Jack, and he pretends that the feeling is mutual - for a bit anyway. His hobbies include DIY and wondering who the f*** you are on a Sunday morning; and waking up in the beds of German men on Thursday mornings. |
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Richard Morgan is another enormous Welsh second row, one of a brace with which the 99/2000 Hands were 'blessed'. He made his debut against the unfortunate Badock, where his strength was tremendous and his ballwinning impressive too. Richard was once on the books with Swansea, and he has left this season for 'better' things - he now plays for Clifton and UWE 1sts, we are led to beleive. |
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Due to his enormous world prestige, Skippy is known only by a single name, rather like Napoleon or Ronaldo - such is the genius of the man. Skippy has played on and off for the Hands for a long time now - we were fortunate enough to have him play the entire 99/00 season, but this season we have difficulty in prying him away from the UWE 1st XV. He has played fullback for the Hands, but his natural position is prop, where he brings pace and dyanmism as well as strength to the front five. Skippy is one of those Hands who is mild-mannered off the pitch and totally furious on it - even when 72-0 up against the UH 'Sharks' he still delighted in confounding and aggravating his opposite man. |
